Building a house is HARD.
No but seriously y’all- the last month almost took all the ‘hard-ass’ I had left in me. The white towel was ready, it was at my hip… it was wadded up and ready to chuck at the first person to cross me.
If you’re wondering where I’ve been the last couple weeks here it is…
That was our front porch… after they demolished it. What a mess.
The front porch- Dream porch, wraparound porch, focal point porch… that porch- was poured incorrectly. We noticed soon after we moved in the issue. It was not acceptable to building standards and we fought to have the contractor correct it at his cost.
And we won.
The porch was jack-hammered into a million tiny rocks on a Thursday and taken off the front of our home in a demolition style melee.
It may sound silly- it is just a piece of concrete. And we won right?! This was a huge victory. There is no reason to be upset… Until you watch the way your daughter looks at it as though they’ve broken everything about her beloved new home.
Every struggle relating to the build up until this point, we could hide from her. The build became a temporary evil. Josh (the hubs) and I had successfully shielded her from thinking that the house had been nothing but a textbook build. She never realized we were four months behind schedule, or that we had furniture and belongings split up into 3 gracious hosts homes plus 2 storage units, or that I spent her entire hour of gymnastics practices fighting with subs all with a smile on my face so she wouldn’t notice through the 2-way mirror that I was done- so done.
I failed to cope with any of it. Complete disbelief. We moved in, our home was beautiful, we started to get back into our own little routines again, LIFE WAS SEMI-NORMAL AGAIN… This isn’t happening?
I vetted every sub-contractor. I had references… I visited prior jobs… I did everything they warn you about. There were supposed to be no hiccups once it was finished.
Now, this is the part I would usually give you a list of things I learned from this story or experience. But there is only one thing I learned. (and a list of 1. is just awkward)
What came first?- You, or the House?
Josh quickly reminded me that we are bigger than this hiccup. He took the reins after letting me pilot the majority of the build (by my choice you should know I’m a bit OCD). He handled the scheduling and the decisions. He packed us up and took us on a weekend trip were Tenley could play in the river and remember that we are together. Forget the rest.
I didn’t ruin our daughter. I didn’t disappoint her. I showed her that you fight and you keep fighting until you get what you want and what is right…
It is not lost on me that a porch should in no way be held in comparison to life lessons. It’s silly when you think back about it. But the journey to get there was everything. And you know I am all about that journey.
We did not have a textbook build. And if you are building the way we did- from the ground up- remember that no one is perfect. You’re going to have problems. In the end you will be better for it. You will be a stronger family, stronger person and stronger inspiration to those who love you.
The cedar posts will go back up and we will be able to finish our lawn and get back to our version of normal. I can’t promise that our normal doesn’t include a crazy toddler playing in the hose on said porch…
It was so worth it…